THE HIGH COST OF NOT LIVING
I don’t have to tell you about the pressures we are all currently feeling. The uncertainty on many different levels; the stress that can come from so much that is happening around us; and of course, the high cost of living.
On my website, these newsletters are posted under the heading of “Positive Reminders”. The aim of these newsletters is to remind all of you of the many tools and techniques my workshops teach.
Can I take those of you who have done “The Centre Within” with me, back to the five points of William Glasser’s “Reality Therapy”?
Those of you who have not done the workshop may find this a whole new concept. If you would like to know more, check out this link – https://wglasserinternational.com/about-dr-william-glasser/
William Glasser maintained that we human beings have five basic needs:
- The basic need for survival: food, water, sunshine, a roof over our head etc. The need to feel safe and secure.
The other four are our basic psychological needs:
- The most important need is to love and be loved by another person or group, for a feeling of belonging and connection to others: spouse, friends, family, co-workers, pets and community.
- The need for power through learning, achieving our aims, feeling worthwhile, feeling we are winning through our competency. This includes our Self Esteem and a desire to leave a legacy.
- The need for freedom, and that includes our independence and autonomy while, at the same time, exercising personal responsibility. It is about having choices, being able to move freely and to pursue our creativity.
- The need for fun, laughter and play, finding pleasure and enjoyment in relaxation; these are important needs for good psychological health.
One of the core principles of Glasser’s “Reality Therapy” is that, whether we are aware of it or not, there is a drive in every one of us to meet these essential human needs.
These needs must all be balanced and met if we are to function effectively. However, we don’t always act productively to achieve these goals.
We know that most of life is about Choice. We are in control of what we are doing in our lives, but sometimes those choices are not working in our favour to meet these needs for Belonging, Power, Freedom and Fun.
In our society, the Survival need is mostly being met. We know there are some finding it very difficult to achieve those basic survival needs, but those of you reading these words probably have that need met.
It is then how we meet the remaining four Psychological needs that we can run into strife.
The key here is to be aware of what each of us currently wants, decide what our aims are, and then make the choices that will ensure those goals are met.
It was Eckhart Tolle in his book “A New Earth” that said “Awareness is the greatest agent for change”.
We cannot change what we don’t acknowledge. Awareness is the beginning, and that means Self Awareness; looking inside ourselves, knowing what it is we want to aim for, and making those choices that will take us to where we want to go.
There will always be outside influences; there will always be inevitable things that happen, things out of our control that we have to deal with. It is important here to ensure we are making those choices that are in our control to achieve those four important basic Psychological needs: Belonging, Power, Freedom and Fun.
I hope all of this is a helpful reminder. When our lives are so busy and we can be under a lot of pressure, we need these reminders every so often.
May I wish you all a couple of those basic needs: Love and Laughter,
